Autobiographical: thankful for what I’ve got

Grateful for the little things I didn’t notice before lockdown

My last relationship ended right at the start of lockdown when two people drifting apart suddenly had a reason not to spend time with each other anymore, so we took it. I had no idea of the scale of the pandemic in those early days, nor how long it would last, or how long I would be alone.

I love writing and threw myself into that in the hope of becoming a freelance writer, something I might try again in the future. I was living alone so the world was filtered through my television and laptop, Google news updates, and the general mood at the local grocery store. Incidentally, I cannot ‘’slut drop’’, but I can crouch down to pick up items off the bottom shelf and stand up again, something I do for fun as well as subtle dancing in the aisles when no one is looking.

Careful what you wish for 

Being single during lockdown has its own drawbacks, such as lack of touch or reassuring handholding when you need it. Before lockdown hit, I would probably liken myself to a cactus. I was prickly, hurt from life experience left me prickly to friendly people who were trying to help. I kept everyone at arm’s length as best I could, and now suddenly it was the law. 

For me, lockdown is like that film Freaky Friday, or Big, where you switch places with someone else because you believe they have it better than you, and at the end you just want to tap your ruby heels together and say ‘’there’s no place like home.’’

New found appreciation

I’m grateful for my local shops, I’m grateful for trains, I’m grateful for people who bother to keep in touch, I’m grateful for exercising outdoors when I’m cooped up all day, I’m grateful for the internet, I’m grateful for my family who drove me mad at times, I’m grateful for so many things in a way I wasn’t before. Perhaps this is what God intended when this virus erupted? Maybe we need to learn to be grateful for what we have, because we’ve all lost so much and it makes you appreciate what you had. 

I’m grateful I’m still alive and have a chance to live life differently after lockdown, God willing. Lockdown has changed me, but in all honesty, it’s a welcome change and what I needed. I would like to see some changes in society though. 

For example, home working and flexible working would make life so much easier for so many people, including parents, and reduce carbon emissions from reducing the number of commuters. I hope the government makes progressive changes like these for the benefit of all of us following how well everyone has coped with the work from home arrangements. The benefits far outweigh any drawbacks from what I can see.

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LucyBower

From tiny acorns mighty oaks grow.

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